Your Spouse can be your best friend

"Your spouse can be your best friend or your worst enemy. You decide." --Lowe's Law for Happy Living #1

This is the most important lesson that I have ever learned in my entire life. It's not something that anyone ever tells you. In fact, if you ask, most people will give you some sugar-coated saying like "your wife will love you" or "love will save anything" or something to that effect.

No one ever mentions that each member of a marriage makes a choice. The husband decides that his wife will be his friend or enemy. The wife makes the decision that her husband will be helpful or hurtful. Usually the choice is not consciously made ... it's made by actions not thought.

Unlike most people, I've decided that my wife is my best friend. It didn't take any thought at all, just a decision "yes, my wife is my friend". It was that simple ... except, of course, to put that decision into action.

The action is actually simple. I begin by listening to my lovely wife. When she says something I usually stop and actually listen to what she has to say. And I do something that few husbands know how to do ... I acknowledge what she says.

I also like what she has to say. I actually like listening to her, and talking to her as well. She's intelligent and has a viewpoint on life that's often different from mine, and I find this refreshing and stimulating.

From the listening and talking comes the doing. I like to bring her little gifts, as often as every single day. Nothing expensive or huge, just a little something to cheer her up. I might bring her her favorite meal, a sweet drink, a stuffed animal or a trinket. Just a little something to show her I love her.

It's critical not to forget your spouse's special days. I always remember our anniversary, her birthday and any other day she feels is important.

There are hundreds of other things that I do to make sure that my wife understands that I love her and am her friend. She does the same for me.

Believe it or not, it works, it's fun and we have been the best of friends for over ten years.

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